The despair Of The British nation.

Thursday, 10 December 2009

Sun Panic.

Copenhagen Summit Debate Intensifies.



"Tuesday, 8/12/2009, marked the 16th straight day without a sunspot. According to spaceweather it marked the 259th sunspotless day this year and the 770th spotless day this minimum. During the day Wednesday, a few small spots emerged from a newly visible plage, an area of enhanced magnetic flux. This moves 2009 into a tie for 5th place with 1856 in the top 20 spotless years since 1849, when that kind of assessment became reasonable. See the enlarged image here."

Delegates in Copenhagen broke off their comic performances to discuss the import of this new data. Could this mean the sun is cooling, do we face an impending ice age or the earth being consumed by fire. Hundreds of scientists "persuaded" to sign up to a ransom note issued by The UK Met Office, are panicking as to what the shortage of sun spots might portend. One scientist, who asked not to be named, stated that were this to continue the Earth would be devoid of CO2 in 50 years. Plants would perish and human beings would be unable to exhale and stifle on their own CO2. One possible answer to this might be the INCREASE, one hundredfold, of CO2 emissions. This might kick start Sunspot activity and avoid a disaster that would put the miniscule temperaure rises into perspective.
On a separate note, it is believed this lack of sunspot activity was behind the suicide of a Mr Ed "Gromit" Miliband who left a note to the effect that without climate change AGW religion, he could no longer bear to live.

The Met Office and 10 Downing Street have declined to accept the science of sunspot degradation and continue to brand those believers as "flatsunners".


6 comments:

Anonymous said...

"flatsunners". Love it!

Killer said...

Fake tan must be on demand...

Demetrius said...

If there is a long lasting blocking high over northern Europe, and it becomes very very cold as in December 1955, if the Ukrainians/Russians turn off the gas, it could get very interesting. All our present economic forecasts will become just moonshine.

Edgar said...

Sun spots? Spots on the face of the Sun? No wonder it always looked so red and inflamed. But the disappearing Sun spots? Maybe the Russians went up there with a billion tons of Clearasil. Who knows?

Barking Spider said...

Nice one, OR, let's see them explain that!

Oldrightie said...

If there is a long lasting blocking high over northern Europe, and it becomes very very cold as in December 1955,

It's just arrived. Duration still to be determined but it looks like it's going to be very cold. Copenhagen might become totally frozen!