The despair Of The British nation.

Thursday, 3 December 2009

The governor of Region 9+?

Back In The Bunker.





For several weeks he had foresworn the sealed, gas proof room below even the basement at the
decimal home of a once proud National Government. Now the long summer and Autumn was done, the documents signed, sovereignty surrendered. Sadly this great achievement was somehow an anti-climax. He’d had a good day against the juvenile but superior Etonian. Ally had taken time off from a film shoot for Hustler, Mandy was sulking over his snub and all seemed well. Then somebody discovered a two year old letter chore had been buggered up. He had not been able to suppress his anger and had insisted the guards set by Snakebite and Testicle Gob be removed from the bunker. As he slammed the door shut and staggered into his steel den, he groaned with a weary pleasure. His Butler had fresh nappies laid out, Dobbin was repaired and ready to go, a basket of shiny new Nokias was in the corner. He quickly shed his clothes, deftly knotted a towelling dirt cloth about his loins and pounced on the basket.
First out, “Testicles Etonian” he shouted and the first mobile shattered against the wall, followed by a screamed “Climategate”. Two more followed with cries of “ungrateful sodding Brits” and the final object was left for a huge yell of bloody soldiers’ bloody families”.
He now leapt onto Dobbin and rocked in his imitable fashion, backwards and forwards. The more angry he became the more he soiled the freshly laundered garment.
Unbeknown to all in the building, a new appointee had observed The Prime Minister disappear into this room. In an effort to be helpful she had led The EU delegation including Ms Merkel and The French Dwarf, on their way to the now unnecessary Copenhagen Summit, down to this subterranean chamber. The noise inside was not audible in the corridor. The large lever moved easily and she swung open the door………………

10 comments:

Killer said...

Brill photo!!!

aspicasp said...

Excellent as always. You do cheer me up. ;)

banned said...

Greetings from District 4. This 'she' is presumably Cafe Ashtray as she is required by her evil masters to demand from Gordon something that he does not wish to do, like say No to Obama ?

Fidothedog said...

Spot on, no doubt he has to be loaded up with MAOI pills before being put down in his cot.

Edgar said...

The decadence of a fading empire becomes more nauseous day by day. One of the upsides, though, is that we, the common people, can, and should, feel superior to these very damaged hominids, these broken individuals whose automatic response to stress is to destroy, these antediluvian, mindless cretins who are infinitely incapable of handling that which they desire most: power.

Jim Baxter said...

'these broken individuals whose automatic response to stress is to destroy, these antediluvian, mindless cretins who are infinitely incapable of handling that which they desire most: power'

You know those times when someone says exactly what you want to say but says it much better? This is one of those times.

Sarkophagus cancelled his 'short visit' did he? Does he ever visit any other way?

Anonymous said...

Haven't looked on here for a long time - you haven't changed OR. Your imagination could do with a good scrub.

fifth column said...

Anonymous, you are not welcome back. Do take another long break.

Anonymous said...

Suits me!
Enjoy your wallowing!

fifth column said...

We do, we do!